Category: Australia

Typically, when there is an addiction in a family, the roles of the family are created around the person with the substance abuse problem. After these roles are set, if someone tries to change or switch roles, the stability of the entire family system is thrown off. Even if it is the addict who changes, it throws off the equilibrium and all the relationships within the family must change in order to become balanced again. Even though the equilibrium can be thrown off because of changes of family roles it does not mean it is negative to change those relationship dynamics within the family.

Here are the usual characteristics experienced in families with addiction.

Addict-The person with the substance abuse problem is the addict. Everything the household does revolves around this person.

Enabler-The enabler is often the spouse of the addict or the oldest child in the family system. This individual is the one making sure things, such as the financial responsibilities, are taken care of and making sure the children are cared for. This individual is the caretaker of the home and generally tries to protect the addict from harm. Often the person is taking care of these items in order to save face in the outside world and present and outward appearance that there is no problems in his family. This person can rarely see the depth of his loved one’s substance abuse problem because he spends so much time covering up the problem instead of dealing with it. He covers up the problem because it is too painful to deal with in reality. In actuality, this particular person is really doing more harm than being helpful by enabling the addict because he is not allowing the addict to experience the consequences of her substance abuse. This role is exhausting because the person is always trying to maintain the balance within the family.

Hero-The hero goes above and beyond to pick up the slack where her parent is lacking due to his substance abuse. She may take on parental roles she is under qualified to do, such as financially providing for younger siblings. This person tries to fix the family in whatever way she can. Deep down this person often hopes she can change the parent’s addiction by being good. There is a sense of pressure these individuals feel to be responsible and help where the addict lacks responsibility. Therefore, this child will generally strive for perfection in most tasks she participates in as well. However, this young person is often filled with stress from the burden of responsibility and perfection she believes she must uphold to present everything as put together to the outside world. She is also often fearful of the outcome if everyone noticed she or her family is not as composed as they seem to portray. She is trying to avoid shameful feelings at all cost because it reminds her of what if feel like to live in a family of addiction.

Scapegoat-Often the scapegoat is the kid who appears out of control due to his parent’s substance abuse problem. He is typically the rebel of the family. This youngster can be in trouble at school, for stealing or in trouble with the law. He is trying to shield himself from the negative feelings he is experiencing at home by acting out. He can gain attention from others outside of the home by acting this way. This young one often feels much anger toward the substance using parent and the chaos he feels in his home.

Mascot-The mascot is typically the comedian of the family or the family jokester. She uses her sense of humor to lighten the tension and take the focus off of the substance abuse happening in her family, even if it is just a temporary fix. Although she appears confident, she is most of the time hiding behind the silliness she is creating to distract her and others from what is really happening within her family. She is often embarrassed by her family situation and feels insecure, so she covers it with the jokes she creates.

Lost Child-The lost child seems to be disconnected and isolated from the family. This child does not have a close relationship with other family members. Therefore, she can find it hard to interact and connect with her peers as well. These individuals sometimes engage in make believe as a way to distance themselves and cope with the issues at home. They typically try to go unnoticed as way to avoid being sucked into the family’s addiction drama.

As you can see, substance abuse is not experienced by simply the addict himself, but it impacts the entire family unit, so it is important for the entire family to seek help in order for the addict to be freed from his addiction. The roles listed above are neither good nor bad, but they must change in order for the substance abuse to cease.

 

Find alternatives to quit drinking. Find new, healthy habits, activities or relationships to fill up your time instead of drinking alcohol. Seek other ways to deal with anxiety, stress or depression as well.

Stay away from things that urge you to want to use alcohol. Think about what triggers your mind to want to drink alcohol. Is it a person or a place? Whatever it is, try to avoid those things in order to stop using alcohol as a crutch for the underlying problem in your life. Are there certain activities that make you want to booze more, such as a sporting event, party or staying up too late? If these things make you want to drink, plan other options to stay away from these events until you can get your drinking problem under control. If your watering hole was on your way home from work, you may need to develop a new route home. Are there certain people you typically drink alcohol with? It might be worth finding a new set of friends to hang out with, so you are not tempted to drink when you are around your old alcohol drinking buddies. If you typically drink alcohol at home, make sure you clean out all alcohol from your house to avoid falling into the trap of boozing while you are at home alone. If there is no alcohol in your house or your desk at work (or wherever the craving hits you), then it will be easier to fight the urge to drink. You may still have the craving, but there will be no alcohol available!

Have a procedure in place for when a sudden trigger hits you. Set goals and make a list of ways to accomplish the goals you set. Call an accountability partner or a friend your trust to talk through how you are feeling and the urges you are experiencing. Have an activity available that you enjoy doing, such as exercise or any other hobby you love. Calm yourself with music. Distract yourself with other healthy behaviors you can think of doing. Do things besides drinking, and chances are your mood will feel better too! Be creative when developing a list of things to distract your mind from drinking. Exerting your energy elsewhere will allow you to cope with the problems in a more productive way as opposed to drinking alcohol.

Know your weaknesses when it comes to drinking. There will be times when you are not prepared for the desire to use alcohol to rear it’s ugly head, so learn your weaknesses to help you fight temptations in the times you may are unprepared for it to happen to you. If you are out with friends, have a go to non-alcoholic drink you order. Remember to be firm in your “no” to use alcohol, even when you are caught off guard. If you have a plan and are prepared, even for those unexpected times, you will be more likely to fight off the urges to drink. It is best to develop a plan, so you do not hesitate or second guess your decision to quit drinking.

Constantly remind yourself why you have chosen to stop drinking. Make list and carry them with you if you need to do so. If you suddenly have something trigger you to want to drink, pull them out and read them. Look back at the reasons you decided to quit often.

Do not beat yourself up if you fall off the wagon and do drink again. Overcoming an alcohol addiction is not easy, so ease up on yourself and refine your methods if your attempt to cease drinking fails. Look at it this way, if you backslide in your recovery, you can use your slip up as a learning experience of ways to improve your methods in the future. If you drink because you left alcohol in your house and thought you would not fall victim to it, then use it as a learning experience to not keep alcohol in your house in the future. Also, remember to take it one day at a time. Every day you do not drink is a successful day. Congratulate yourself when you make progress and recognize it is not the end of the world if you mess up while trying to quit drinking. Hop back on the train toward recovery and learn from the mistakes you make.

Seek help for an alcohol abuse problem when it is out of your control. It is a good idea to get help for the underlying issues that are causing you to drink as well. If your alcohol dependence is getting in the way of your everyday life, it may be time to seek professional help to overcome the issue.

Hopefully this advice will help you curb your alcohol urges and lead you down the path of recovering from your alcohol addiction.

The fact that addiction will damage your health, wealth and home life becomes increasingly apparent to those who regularly takes illegal substances.

They are leaving themselves wide open to dependence issues and should never think:

It couldn’t possibly happen to me:

WRONG! Very, very wrong. Addiction is non-selective; it is not racist or sexist. It has a hunger that is frightening and a net it casts wide.

The illicit substances that are its recruiting agents are persuasive. They introduce themselves with cracking highs and dreamlike experiences. Users are given an immediate provisional membership card stamped “Keep taking and full membership is yours”.

Everyone dabbling with drugs is at risk of addiction:

It would be foolish to state that everyone who uses illegal substances will automatically become dependent upon them, but this does not alter the fact that regular users are creaking open a very dark door.

How far their journey through it continues is open to negotiation. Many millions of men and women realise that their drug use is escalating too quickly for comfort and will stop before it is too late.

Unfortunately there are also many who find increased use snowballs into dependence. These men and women will eventually face up to the fact that only time, perseverance and the assistance of professional rehabilitation services will they stand a chance of beating their habit.

Tolerance:

Addiction will damage your health, wealth and home life largely thanks to ‘Tolerance’ in terms of drug use this really does spell ‘T’ for trouble.

The tolerance we are talking about relates to your mind and body. They both take to your drug of choice with an enthusiasm that is scary.

Because of the very pleasant highs received your mind and body are quick to latch on. They will persuasively encourage you to ‘feed’ this need on a regular basis.

The problem is that such tolerance is not satisfied with receiving the same amount of the drug each time.

Users quickly find this approach leads to a reduction of the powerful highs initially experienced. To ensure ‘quality’ highs are maintained your mind will quickly oblige with a solution:

The natural ‘answer’ to tolerance:

To continue experiencing those powerful highs the natural answer is to take more of the drug on a more frequent basis.

And guess what? It does the trick, at least for a short while, but fairly soon that ‘hit’ needs to be increased and so your downward spiral into addiction continues.

Please be very clear: Your mind and body have a tolerance that will continue to grow and thus encourage you to take more to satisfy these intense cravings.

Addiction will damage your health, wealth and home life – Part 1:

Persistent drug use will damage your health in various ways. Not just physically but also mentally.

Those dependent upon drugs find their sleep patterns become irregular. The effects of certain drugs will mean they have no desire to sleep for long periods.

When they do fall into an uneasy sleep, or one that has been brought about through sheer exhaustion they will sleep for excessively long periods. Losing a day here or there can become a common occurrence.

Their diet is generally shot to pieces. Long periods of not eating or simply snacking will become commonplace. This is often followed by excessive food bingeing sessions.

Physical exercise will become a thing of the past, and the potential damage to your internal organs does not bear thinking about.

Because your body is an amazingly resilient ‘machine’ a lot of this physical damage can heal fairly quickly once an addict has committed to long term rehab assistance, but the psychological effects are often not so forgiving. Many ex-addicts suffer from extended mental issues that last long after they have stopped use.

Addiction will damage your health, wealth and home life – Part 2:

It goes without saying that heavy drug use comes at a price to your bank balance. Those early, cheap scores offered by your ‘friendly’ dealer were not an act of kindness or charity.

They were made in the full knowledge that once a user gets a taste for their drug(s) of choice this habit will steadily empty existing cash reserves while healthily topping up the dealers.

In many cases desperate times lead to desperate measures and those with drug dependence issues will turn to stealing from their loved ones, opportunist theft, petty burglaries and prostitution as means of obtaining that much needed cash.

The only thing that really matters to an addict is that they have enough money to feed their ever growing habit.

Addiction will damage your health, wealth and home life – Part 3

It is a very sad fact, but those dependent upon drugs are fully aware of the pain and anguish caused to family and/or partners. While they are aware of it this will not stop them inflicting such hurt.

They will convince themselves that their actions are nowhere near as damaging as they actually are. They will constantly tell themselves that this is only a temporary situation and they will make full amends ‘soon’.

If you are an addict in this situation then it is time to face up to the undeserved grief you are causing. Those nearest and dearest to you will generally show a loyalty that is borne from love and concern.

Just two examples of this loyalty are that they will suppress their real feelings when money or household belongings mysteriously disappear in the hope they will eventually ‘turn up’. They will also be the first to stand up and defend you against critics.

What is very important for all heavy drug users to understand is that these courageous people have their own breaking point. Your continued drug use and associated actions will eventually tip them over this point.

Deep down an addict knows the trouble and sadness they are causing. Unless they find the inner strength to seek professional drug rehab assistance they will end up out in the cold and alone.

Addiction will damage your health, wealth and home life – Stop the rot!

Those who feel their drug use is getting out of hand, or those already dependent upon their drug of choice need to stand up and be counted.

Continuing down this road will lead to a dead end in a vehicle that has no reverse gear. These users need to admit to themselves how serious their problem is and take the brave step of seeking rehab treatment.

Such a move will be the first large stride on the road to recovery. It will spawn a realisation that there is a life waiting which spells hope, and just as importantly that life will be one to be enjoyed without the need for drugs.

No punches pulled, no excuses given. If you are addicted to your drug of choice, or find you are becoming evermore dependent upon them you need professional help.

One proven and effective choice is registering for inpatient treatment and therapy. Below we will give some of the key reasons as to why you should consider a stint at a luxury rehab resort.

But, first things first, there is something you need to do.

Stand Up and Own Up:

A trait common to the countless men and women who are now dependent upon drugs is denial.

They will lie to the ones closest to them about their drug consumption, and even more damaging, they will convince themselves that they are in control of their drug use and not the other way round.

Excessive drug taking is damaging your body and your mind. It is also causing untold angst and concern amongst those closest to you.

Until you take the very brave step of admitting to yourself just how serious your dependence has become you are on a one way street signposted “Deeper dependence and addiction”.

What’s with the denial?

Before getting into why you should consider a stint at a luxury rehab resort lets put the issue of denial to bed.

The reason you will continue to deny there are serious issues is based on FEAR! This fear relates to the frightening consequence of how you will possibly cope without your regular hit.

Many addicts have reached the stage where their first fuzzy thoughts upon waking are drug related, and such thoughts remain their constant ‘companion’ throughout the day and long into the night.

While such fear is completely understandable it is vital for you to realise that the longer you deny, the deeper your problems will become.

Help yourself and seek professional help:

You should NOT be ashamed that addiction has currently got the better of you, and you must believe that with willpower, perseverance, determination and the caring, professional help available that you can come off, and stay off drugs for the foreseeable future.

Drug rehabilitation programs and services have been around for a long time, the professionals in this field fully understand the challenges and issues you face.

Rest assured they will make it their job to help you overcome these problems in a structured, sensible and caring way.

So, here is the first reason why you should consider a stint at a luxury rehab resort:

Unique, fresh environment:

Your current environment has more than likely got a lot to do with why you are hooked on drugs. You will be mixing with like-minded users and have several dealers phone numbers off pat.

The life you are leading has taken on a routine all of its own. That routine revolves around scoring, preparing and receiving that desperately needed high.

It also leads to temptation and temptation when coming off drugs is something you must avoid.

A stay at a luxury rehab resort will certainly change that, and rather than looking at an establishment in your own country you should seriously consider an overseas destination such as South-East Asia.

I’m not made of money!

Many people automatically assume that the cost of an inpatient stay at an overseas rehab resort in this beautiful part of the world will be way beyond their financial means.

In fact it is exactly the opposite and is a major reason as to why you should consider a stint at a luxury rehab resort abroad.

For example, the cost of staying at such an establishment in Thailand is around one-third of the cost of similar establishments in western countries.

You will also find that quality overseas establishments have been approved by major personal health insurers and certain policies are accepted as cover for treatment.

Fully qualified staff:

While a stay at such a resort is excellent value for money, this does not mean you are getting any less in terms of the fully qualified staff employed there.

Medical, counseling and other relevant staff will have industry standard qualifications that meet recognized global standards and are very likely to have worked in other rehab centres in various parts of the western world.

Rules, Routine, Respect:

Before being accepted as a client at any respectable inpatient rehab establishment it is important to understand you will need to agree to rules laid down. Such rules are sensible and have been set to ensure you have the best possible chance of beating your addiction.

Regular routine is another strong reason as to why you should consider a stint at a luxury rehab resort. By having focus, keeping active and attending private as well as group therapy sessions such a routine will help you develop strength and determination to beat your addiction.

Respect for yourself, other inpatients and the rehab resort staff is a key ingredient to the success of such establishments. Self-respect can be very low amongst those struggling with drug issues; experienced councilors will work to help you regain respect for yourself and those around you.

The better you feel about yourself the more positive you will become about your current situation and the fact that there really is a future without drugs.

A whole new experience:

Breaking free of the sterile environment you are currently stuck in and the rut which is getting deeper are vital reasons why you should consider a stint in a luxury rehab resort. You need a breath of fresh air in more ways than one.

A stay in a tropical location offers a whole new experience for many, and involves a raft of new sights, sounds and activities. Such things will blend well with the physical, psychological and spiritual sessions you will take part in on an individual basis as well as through group sessions.

Challenging for a reason:

Any luxury rehab resort worth its salt will make sure your stay is a productive but challenging one, and this is for very strong reasons.

It will certainly be no walk in the park, but understanding what drugs have done to your life, what can happen if you continue feeding your habit, and responding to the challenging sessions you will be involved in an honest, open and positive manner is key to giving you the best possible chance of kicking that habit into touch and looking forward to a drug free future.

Reclaim your life – Take up the challenge!

There are many more valid reasons why you should consider a stint at a luxury rehab resort, but hopefully the above has encouraged those with drug issues to rise to the challenge and make a very important

If you are worried about a friend, who is using drugs, it is important to learn the best ways to talk to him about your concerns. You can help your friend by gaining information about drug use. It is a good idea to learn all you can about drug abuse before talking with your friend. If you understand addiction, you will be better able to talking about the reasons you want your friend to quit her addiction, It will also allow you to better empathize when she is talking about her own addiction. Do some research and figure out as much as you possibly can about drug addiction before talking to your friend about recovering from his addiction.

Keep in mind your pal may not see his drug problem the same way you see it. He might not believe he even has a drug problem. If he cannot see he has a problem, then he will probably not see he needs to make any changes in his life regarding his drug use. Help him to see his substance abuse problem clearly. Help him to see the facts of his drug abuse. If you present the facts of his drug abuse, it then becomes his choice to recognize and change them in the future.

Share with your friend the reasons you are concerned about her drug abuse. State specific times you have been worried about your friend when she has been using drugs. Mention your concerns about her health or other ways you have noticed her addiction has impacted her life. Also, tell her how her addiction has impacted your life as well as your relationship with her. Reassure your friend that you do not want her to live her life this way any longer. Show her how much you care about her and inform her that you do not want her to suffer from this abuse any further.

Stay positive and restrain from being condescending or shaming your friend about her drug dependence. It can be tempting to want to judge another person when you do not walk in her shoes, but refrain from making this mistake when talking with your loved one about her habit of taking drugs. Being harsh might only push the person farther away, making it more difficult to help her get sober in the future. Help her to see the positive effects of quitting her drug abuse. Assist her in clearly seeing the ways her life can be different if she chooses to stop using drugs. Praise her any chance you can when she makes strides toward dropping her drug use. Let her know you worry about her, and gently continue to point out you can only help her in the future if she seeks treatment for her addiction. However, remind her constantly you will be there to support her whenever she needs it.

Remember to point out facts instead of emotions when talking to your friend about his addiction. Refrain from trying to guilt him into giving up his drug abuse problem, and realize threatening another person to desert a drug dependence never works either. Negative thoughts or feelings is often what create drug habits in the first place, so avoiding talking down to him and belittling him. Be honest as you communicate about how his addiction has affected you and your relationship with him. Persons with a drug habit are often unaware of how the addiction is influencing relationships overall, so keep in mind how you choose to communicate you want for him to get help because it can make a huge difference in how he responds to the information you present to him.

Do not forget to take care of yourself through this process. It can be exhausting talking to a friend with a drug abuse problem. Therefore, make sure you are seeking the help you need while you are helping an addicted loved one. Arrange to do things you enjoy. Doing things you love brings joy to your life and makes you happy. Make sure you are eating a proper diet and getting enough sleep too. Also, ask for help when you need to do so. Although it may sometimes feel like it, caring for yourself is not a selfish act.

Remind yourself often recovery for your friend is possible. Even when it does not seem like recovery is possible, sobriety is always achievable. Although it may feel as though you are getting through to your friend, continue to have conversations with him that will allow him to see the effects of his drug abuse. You never know when something might get through and stick in his brain to help push him toward seeking help.

There is no one way of talking to a friend who is addicted to drugs. Your friend can choose to take your advice or not, but remember it is not your fault if he chooses not to follow through with the aid you provide him. Do not blame yourself if your friend chooses not to allow support for his drug addiction. However, talking with him about his addiction can assist him in seeing how his addiction is impacting the people he loves and potentially pushing him to get the cure he needs for his addiction.