Category: Australia

The holiday season is upon us. The streets are bustling with busy shoppers and everywhere you see there are festive decorations and people spreading Christmas cheer. Unless you are an addict of course. In that case, streets are noisy, happy people remind you of how unhappy and depressed you feel, of the people you lost along the road of addiction. Holidays can mean a wide range of different things for different people. Most addicts would agree, though, that the holiday season can take its toll on them. It can be stressful for most, but for a recovering addict, it is on a whole new level. Gray and dark days, mandatory “pretend everything is perfect” parties and financial pressure can make even the most steadfast and resilient addict reach for a drink or a drug of their choice, just to take the edge off.

Holiday season means slippery roads for everyone. For most addicts, this slippery slope is all it takes for a full blown relapse.

But why?

People who don’t understand why holidays can be extremely difficult for an addict just need to think a little and it all makes sense. It is important to understand what is it, that triggers a recovering addict into relapse. Negativity, depression, temptation, stress and conflict. These and much more contribute to an addict and his reasons for using. Now, let’s have a look why something as happy and cheery as Christmas holidays could invoke any of the aforementioned feelings.

Cold periods of the year tend to bring with them a slew of undesirable weather patterns. Dark, dreary gray skies, sleet on the streets and wet clothing will make anyone miserable. Bad weather impacts all of us more than we would like to admit. There is always that voice at the back of addicts mind, the one that says its ok to be weak, ok to break and seek relief. An addict will find any excuse to use again and bad weather is as good an excuse as any. Staying positive when everything around you seems morbid and cold can be a daunting task.

Most holiday gatherings involve a lot of people and place a huge emphasis on food and drink. Staying sober is a tough act to keep up if all you can think about is that eggnog or a glass of brandy in front of the cozy fire. These parties usually consist of large amounts of people, mostly family, and friends. This means a lot less emphasis and attention is focused on any one individual in particular. Unless of course, your last name is Claus. This may give an addict an impression that he can get away with relapsing without anyone noticing. Flawed reasoning may come across the addict’s mind. Surely everyone in this room would be happier if I didn’t feel depressed and avoided everyone, right? Just a bump to keep me happy will make them happy too, right? Wrong. Intense amount of self-control and external support is necessary to resist such thoughts.

There may be those on the other side of the spectrum, however. There are a large amount of people who are not very family oriented. People who may have lost contact with their family, most often due to their addiction in the first place. Spending a time usually associated with happiness and bonding with family can be very challenging for a person who is lonely for one reason or other. Statistically, Thanksgiving and Christmas is the time of the year when most of that year’s suicides and drug overdoses happen.

How to stay strong?

There are a few things a recovering addict may do to alleviate these challenges. If you are attending a social gathering, it’s wise to do so with a friend or a family member that is fully aware of your addiction and is dedicated to supporting you in your recovery. Something as simple as having someone to talk to during a moment of weakness can be all it takes to avoid wasting years of hard work towards sobriety.

Always remember that you are not obliged to put your sobriety in jeopardy just to attend some event that you feel might not pan out too well for you and your self-control. If you suspect there will be people that will annoy you, situations that will stress you or anything that could make you anxious – just say no. It’s not worth it.

If you do muster the inner strength to face challenges of social gatherings during holidays, make sure you remain in control. As mentioned earlier, most holidays focus on drink and food. Thanksgiving and Christmas being the biggest offenders. If you are offered a drink, make sure you make it yourself or remind people that you have to be sober. If you don’t feel like engaging in a lengthy recollection of your struggle with addiction and the person offering you a drink does not seem to accept “no thanks” for an answer, simply come up with an excuse for remaining sober. Doctors appointment. Being a designated driver. Whatever will make the temptation back off and allow you to remain in control?

There is no such thing as “just the one, for this occasion”. A journey towards being sober and addiction free can take a long time and many steps, while a single slip-up can send you tumbling back to the very beginning. Don’t jeopardize your chances for happiness, stay sober during holidays, avoid temptations and soak in support from family and friends.

Merry Christmas!

For those of us, who have mustered up the strength to admit their shortcomings and issues with addiction, for those who chose to seek help in a rehab – do you ever consider what will your life be like once you are done with your rehabilitation course? What will you do when the recovery stage is considered complete? Perhaps you are an addict still, but simply ponder how will you cope, will you be able to resist the temptations and have the strength to support yourself through these kind of difficult times. One thing is for certain, just because you are an addict or an addict in recovery, that classification does not define you or what you can achieve in life.

Structure in an addicts life means everything. It gives reasoning and meaning to the actions he or she takes, does or considers. Chaotic approach and going with whatever twist your life throws you is what got you addicted in the first place. Do you have a plan for when the addiction recovery part of your life is over? If you don’t, here are some ideas you could dedicate your free time to.

Become the example you had during your recovery.

Once you are out of recovery, its hard to find a direction at first. It has probably been years since the main thing to rule your daily life has not been centered around finding drugs or using them. At the same time, you have succeeded, your hardest trials and tribulations are over. It’s no surprise that former addicts fall in two main groups. Ones that put their addiction behind them forever, move on with their lives and try to forget anything ever happened. Then there are those who learn from their mistakes, wear their addiction recovery as a badge of honor and strive to share their success story with less fortunate and still addicted people around them.

Either case if perfectly fine and acceptable. You don’t owe anything to anyone, short of gratitude of course. If you wish to move on with your life and forget you were ever in need of help, that is your right. However, if you feel like this challenge in your life needs to mean something, I urge you to consider helping others. No doubt there were people in your therapy group that you looked up to, that helped you through your toughest hours of rehab or recovery. Become that person. Help addicts to climb that slippery slope with your experience, your understanding, empathy, and support. Not only does it help you stay focused and fills you with a sense of purpose, you are also helping others change their lives around – a very noble and respectable thing to do.

Find a job

This might seem an odd thing to focus on after recovery, but as most addicts know it is incredibly hard to keep a job while being addicted. An addict values nothing more than their next hit and work ethic and attendance goes out the window as soon as you are daydreaming with the drug of your choice streaming through your system.

First things first, establish if you wish to return to a similar job you had or perhaps it is time to turn over a new leaf and look for something completely new. Odds are, your old job had something to do with you turning to drugs. Long hours, boring desk work or perhaps feeling meaningless in a factory job. These things happen. Not everyone is cut out for those kind of jobs, so consider if you wish to return or start fresh.

Considering there is a certain amount of stigma towards former addicts when it comes to job opportunities, sit down with someone from your group or a sponsor and put together a CV that underlines your skills and willingness to work and dedicate your attention to it. Do some research and look for any ex-convict or ex-addict work programs, there are countless of them across the globe. They are catered to people looking to turn their lives around and could be just the thing you are looking for.

Don’t lose focus

It’s been years since you are out of recovery. Your family is happy, you have a stable job. Those hobbies you took up take up most of your time and all is well in the world. If only you could save that time you spend each week in the group meetings. Might just skip a few to paint the new fence, no harm done right? Wrong!

The amount of people that relapse and fall into the same old traps after being clean for years, it’s staggering. Don’t lose your focus. Stay true to your treatment plan, your meetings, and group therapy sessions. Whatever you choose to do after recovery, stick to your rehabilitation plan. Your body might no longer be addicted to various chemicals, but your mind still remembers that feeling you had when you took a hit or a bump. Every formed addict will tell you that the cravings and temptations come at moments you expect them the least. The best way to ensure you have your head straight is to remain in close contact with your sponsor, rehabilitation group and people that care about you and what you might do if left unchecked.

 

If any of this is of interest to you, I want to congratulate you. You have made a huge step already. Either you are fresh out of rehab and looking for ways to enrich your now sober life, or you are an addict about to make some very hard decisions. Don’t be afraid to look for help, there are other people out there just like you and together they can help you stay true to yourselves and those around you.

Medication is a great crutch when it comes to dealing with health and well-being issues. We have a slight headache and outcomes paracetamol. We rely on medicine for nearly all ailments these days, we have been led to believe that all it takes is just a quick pill or jab and we are good to go. Most opiate addicts will no doubt interject, that reliance on medication is what got them in their addiction troubles, to begin with. As it stands, United States have a veritable epidemic of people getting addicted to painkillers and other prescription or over-the-counter medication. It’s time to step back and re-evaluate the way we approach medicine and look at alternatives that could aid our well-being without flooding our bodies with chemicals.

So what can a recovering addict do instead of using addiction suppressing medicine? There are some cases of addiction treatment can not forego some medicinal intervention, for the simple reason being that their bodies and brain chemistry balance has gone too far to simply go “cold turkey”, as they say. Severe alcoholism and heroin addictions are just a few of these cases. Without proper care and medical attention the addict can suffer such harsh withdrawal symptoms that they can die from heart attack or respiratory shock. That said, there is very little incentive and need to remain on invasive medicine courses after you have gone through your detox period.

Meditation

For years you might have focused your mind entirely on your drug of choice. Where to get money for it, where to get the drug, where to use it. Having that mindset, it’s not easy to put that behind once you are on the path of recovery. Changing an opinion is easy, changing entire mindset is not only hard, it’s a very long process. Changing one’s outlook does not happen overnight. Meditation will allow you to focus on what matters. It has helped countless recovering addicts to change the way they think about stress, problems, anger and most important of all – cravings.

Counselling

Most people who are looking for alternatives to the medicinal approach of addiction recovery are usually fresh out of a rehabilitation center. It should come as no surprise then that most are eager to return to their daily lives without supervision or being told what to do and what not to do. Most recovering addicts at this stage have no desire to find a therapist or a counselor who can give them guidance since they just finished doing that in the rehab. Yet, a continuation of your out-of-rehab recovery with a professional to talk with is incredibly beneficial and will aid you in dealing with urges and pent up stress. Never underestimate advice of a professional.

Physical Activities

Most people find it hard to believe when they are told that exhausting yourself in various forms of exercise will make you feel better. It seems counter-intuitive but it is very true. Physical exertion releases a wide array of hormones that affect the way you think. Endorphins flowing, dopamine pumping and serotonin streaming through your brain will not only help your mood improve, it will also help in a much more straightforward way – make you physically fit and healthy. And all that without a pill or a shot in sight.

Support Group

When you are met with your inner demons and all those cravings come bubbling to the surface, it’s not always easy to stay strong. Just as detrimental it can be to keep company that still uses drugs, it’s as beneficial to stay in a circle of people who have gone through the same hardships as you have. People who think in a similar way, don’t judge, understand and probably most importantly, actually listen. Abandoning a support group is probably the biggest mistake a recovering addict could possibly do. If you feel tempted, lonely, misunderstood and frustrated a group of people who feel the same and understand your state of mind can be invaluable on your path to recovery.

Hobby

As the proverb goes, idle hands are the devil’s playthings. A lack of things to do with one’s hands may not be the most apt comparison to a depressed and tempted mind of an addict, but it is rather appropriate in the idea it conveys. Idling in boredom and addict is locked in its own mind. A mind that is filled with traps and potholes of anxiety and self-pity. Saying “just think about something else” to a conflicted addict is borderline criminal, yet occupying the mind with things he enjoys and finds interesting can do a world of good. Learn how to write code, go fishing, break out a painting set or look up local paintball fields. Find a distraction you enjoy, whatever it may be, and devote your free time to it. Every minute spent measuring the size of a birdhouse you are building is a minute away from cravings and temptations.

 

There are a number of approaches to beat an addiction without placing yourself in a medicated stupor. Experiment, research, learn and apply. Pretty soon the bad thoughts will leave you and allow you to live a fulfilling life.

Relapse. A word any recovering addict wakes up and goes to sleep with. It’s always there, that feeling, that nagging thought. There is no escaping it, there is only fortifying against it and remaining strong against its onslaught of waves. It’s not so difficult to stay strong and focused in our daily lives, but there will come a time when a choice or a decision has to be made. A decision that could lead you to make a mistake and fall in the relapse trap. Let’s continue our overview of some of the most popular and prominent relapse triggers and how to avoid them.

Unrealistic goals

No one is perfect, least of all addicts. Addicts in recovery are no different, we are all people, after all, not machines. To make mistakes is in the nature of humanity. A string of mistakes have been made that got us in this situation in the first place, right? There is no need to deny it or run away from it. You have made mistakes before and there is plenty more where those came from, so don’t beat yourself up when you feel anxious, angry, frustrated or tempted. It is normal. Try to stay true to your recovery plan and if anything goes off-the-rails, don’t sit on the tracks with your head in your hands. Shake it off and focus your attention towards getting back on track.

Dysfunctional family

We don’t choose our family, we have what we have and must make do. One can not simply swap a sibling or two, change your parents or even more distant family like cousins and aunts or uncles. That said, if your family is highly dysfunctional and prone to arguments, drama and makes you anxious, there is nothing that will force you to keep their company and join their angst-riddled merry-go-round of bickering and blaming. No family is perfect, just like no human being is perfect, we already established that. Families consist of people, therefore to presume that a group of imperfect people could form a perfect family is just an illusion. There is imperfect and then there is toxic. Extremely toxic family relationships could have been the very reason you made those bad decisions that landed you in addiction. In these cases, it is more important than ever to distance yourself from the negativity that these people bring to your life. It is not worth slipping back into the abyss just to please your family. A family that cares for each other, at least on some level, will understand and support that decision.

Overconfidence

There is a reason why you got addicted. A very good reason, one way or another. What that reason may be, is largely dependent on each individual and the immediate world around them. The majority of people, however, start using because they are confident, that they will not get addicted. There is a fine line between confidence and overconfidence. You made it through your 30 days of inpatient rehab, sat through the support group talks and checked in for a few weeks already. Surely that’s enough, right? Wrong! It doesn’t matter whether you are recovering from addiction for 5 weeks, 5 months or 5 years. As soon as you feel that your addiction was a non-issue and is a thing of the past, you have sabotaged your recovery and a relapse is more than likely to happen as soon as you have a really bad day. We all get bad days from time to time, it’s important to not let them control us and our cravings. Most recovering addicts have slipped in relapse without even realizing it, just because they underestimate the long lasting mental and psychological impact it leaves on people.

Keep these thoughts with you as a warning and reminder how easy it is to slip up. Better yet, personalize possible relapse triggers and write them down somewhere. There are recovering addicts that write down every single situation that led them to thoughts of relapsing. They write it down on a small card and keep them in a wallet, close at hand for when you need reminding of the previous times you almost gave up but found the courage and strength to stay true to yourself and keep resisting the urges. Not only will this remind you, that you are not the only person going through these very prominent triggers, but also to remind you of that corner in your mind that found strength the last time you had to make a hard decision.

 

You successfully came to a conclusion, that your addiction is no longer going to control your life. You did your research, you did your detox, you even went through an inpatient program in a professional rehabilitation center. You are now an addict in recovery. Consciously knowing all the terrible things drugs did to you, your body, mental state and social life make you feel like you would never, ever go back there. Not while you had something to say about it. And then it comes – a craving, a passing thought, an itch at the back of your skull that you can’t quite scratch. You break, you succumb to the inner voice that reminds you – you’ve done it before, you can get clean again, it’s just one bump after all. And when you have relapsed, back in the ditch with a needle in your arm, provided you are conscious at all, you begin to wonder, what was the mistake that allowed you to relapse. Let’s have a look at some of the most popular mistakes that have been crucial to countless relapses and failed recoveries.

Leaving support behind

It doesn’t matter what it is, a tight-knit group of supportive friends, a 12 step program group or a church group – stick with them. They were there to support you in your first steps and will be there for you long after you have sobered up. There will come a point when a recovering addict will consider himself cured and treated. At that point, these meetings may seem unnecessary, but in truth, they are what got you to the self-assured and confident sober situation you are in right now. Without them, you would never have made it this far. While being confident and proactive in life is nothing but commendable, it’s important not to get overconfident and slip up because you felt that you had outgrown the very support that pushed you through the clouds in the first place.

Firing your counselor

For very similar reasons as the above point, don’t charge into quitting your relationship with your counselor. It is something that should be recommended by him, rather than your own feelings. There will come a time when that will happen, but there is a reason why your own decision-making skills can be put under scrutiny and deemed not to be in your own best interests. Stay safe, stay connected and make that hurdle when both you and your counselor thinks it’s time to move on.

Returning to unwelcome company

Homo Sapiens is a very social creature. An addict is just as human as anyone else and as such usually seek out connections and like-minded individuals to spend time with, socialize and make connections that allow them to score drugs. While being addicted, you probably spent a long time with some of these people, called them friends. They are no longer your friends, or at the very least, they should not be, in order to achieve true recovery. Sounds harsh, but when it’s your literal life on the line, some hard choices have to be made. These people enabled your use, supplied it even, in some cases. Being surrounded by addicts tripping on a drug you once used together is no place to be for a recovering addict. Avoid this situation at all costs.

Falling for a quick relief

Being addicted does a number of things to your psyche and memories. Any recovering addict will tell you – there comes a day when you can literally taste the drug on the tip of your tongue, feel its after-effects or even smell them. You could be on the toilet, working or just watching TV.It can strike at any moment. At that point, the urge and the suppressed need to use comes rushing back to the surface like a shaken soda bottle being opened. It is overwhelming and hard to resist, which makes it all the more important to have a distraction from it as soon as it happens. Call a friend, go for a walk, start a new project at work or engage your mind in other ways. It is all in your mind, after all, nothing more.

 

These are but a few of the most popular causes and triggers for relapse. Getting to recovery is hard, it is exhausting and mentally challenging, but during the rehabilitation phase, you have support and help from professionals and other recovering addicts. It allows you to focus on your goal and achieve it with relative ease – there are always people around you that will help. When you are no longer an in-patient and return to normal life as a recovering addict, there is no more hand-holding and there will be hard choices to make when there will be no one around you. It’s in these moments we must remind ourselves what we went through and that we have help just a call away. We will continue talking about the pitfalls any recovering addict should avoid, in our next article.