Category: Australia

For those with a normal, healthy sex life the mention of a sex addict conjures up lewd images of a man or woman with a libido that is out of control.

They will consider those addicted to sex as ready to give and receive sexual favours at the drop of a hat, and for them to function on a sexual diet that offers a banquet of pleasure on an unfeasibly regular basis.

The reality for those addicted to sex is very, very different. This diagnosed illness needs long term treatment and counselling of the highest order. Such treatment is a must if an addict is to come to terms with their issues and the effect it is having on their and others lives.

Definition of a sex addict:

No, it is not ‘Dick’ the barfly who will sleep with whoever shows the slightest interest. It is an extremely worrying and concerning addiction that is characterised by compulsive thoughts, need and desires that are never far from the surface.

If not treated this addiction will gradually deepen to the point where many sex addicts find it impossible to manage their sexual behaviour.

Sometimes referred to as sexual dependency or hyper-sexuality, the term nymphomania is a fairly well known moniker for females with this problem. What may not be so well known is the term for males with this condition; it is satyriasis.

Multiple partners, multiple ways of seeking ‘pleasure’:

It goes without saying that someone who is constantly having sexual thoughts will find as many sexual partners as they can fit in. It is all about quantity, not necessarily quality.

A percentage will also look to animals or children to help satisfy their needs, while the vast majority will use porn to the extreme and any objects at hand will assist while excessive masturbation is a given.

Inpatient treatment is strongly recommended:

Men and women with this addiction are in need of long term help and counselling. It is similar to alcohol or drug addiction in the sense that the addict is always chasing their ‘fix’, but it is very different in terms of the expected ‘healing’.

Those addicted to substances make a commitment to quit use for good, this approach is not feasible in relation to sex.

A normal, healthy sex life is an important part of a person’s being. What those with sex addiction issues need to be taught and treated for is to understand what is a healthy interest in sex as opposed to what is not.

Their constant sexual thoughts and deeds need to be addressed and reduced, and they will be taught how to control such impulses during the treatment process.

Due to such intense treatment it is felt that taking a sex addict out of their standard environment and into a well-respected inpatient rehab establishment is the most effective approach.

Two proven forms of treatment:

In-depth therapy sessions are a must. These will be on a one-to-one basis as well as group therapy sessions. Frank, open discussion is the order of the day and experienced sex therapy councillors will include such treatment methods as:

12-steps programs:

Using a 12-steps program follows the same recovery methodology as that employed by voluntary organisations such as Alcoholics Anonymous. There is actually a Sex Addicts Anonymous organisation which can also help those currently addicted to sex.

As was previously mentioned, the difference between alcoholics or drug addicts and those addicted to sex is that this form of treatment will major on the sex addict learning how to refrain from, rather than give up sex completely.

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT)

Another popular and extremely effective form of treatment is CBT. This therapy will help a sex addict identify the multiple triggers which are causing these immensely powerful impulses.

Once these are established CBT then assists by teaching the addict what changes in behaviour are necessary to curb their sexual obsession. Such treatment is based around one-to-one sessions with a qualified therapist.

Sex is fun and enjoyable – Addiction to sex is not:

It cannot be stressed enough that just because a person has a healthy libido and enjoys regular and varied sex sessions how this is part and parcel of a normal, interesting and rewarding sex life.

But, if you have gone beyond this point and are obsessed with sex, increase your sexual partners as and when you can, and constantly need pornography as a backdrop to incessant masturbation then help is urgently required.

This problem will not go away on its own, indeed it will worsen as your addiction deepens.

It is felt by many sex therapists and councillors that the amount of people seeking help for this problem is simply the tip of the iceberg. Many, many more hide this addiction until their world comes tumbling down.

If you are one of these please seek urgent and much needed rehab assistance. It will do you and those closest to you the power of good.

Variously known as Ya ba, yaba, yah bah in Thai this highly addictive drug translates into English as “Mad Drug’’.

It was originally known as Ya Ma; Horse Drug, because it was given to horses pulling heavy loads up mountains in the far northern Shan State of Thailand.

These two facts alone should warn you to stay away from this mix of methamphetamine and caffeine that is produced in tablet form.

How is it used?

Tablets are circular and generally coloured red, pink or orange. Four ways the drug is taken are by swallowing, smoking, snorting or injecting.

Those who swallow a pill will find the drug can affect them for between 8 and 16 hours. To smoke the pill, it is placed on aluminium foil, heated from below under a yellow flame, and as it melts the vapour is inhaled using a ‘paper’ straw. This high can last anywhere between 1-3 hours with a reduced intensity.

Some users crush their ‘tab’ and snort it while fewer crush it, mix it with a solvent and inject it. Those advanced addicts who do inject drugs prefer the ‘pure’ product of ice (methamphetamine) once their drug addiction has reached such a stage.

‘Positive’ effects:

One thing is for sure, those regularly using Ya ba will forfeit much needed sleep time. This drug will keep you alert and awake for extended periods. This state is further compounded by the fact the drug is extremely moreish.

‘’Once bitten twice shy” certainly does not apply when using Ya ba. One tab is never enough, then again neither are two!

Euphoria and hot flushes are common, incessant talking affects many, sitting still for long periods is not on the agenda, and any thoughts of eating take a back seat.

Negative effects:

We all know that where there is a drug high, a low must eventually follow. Ya ba offers many unwanted effects.

When a user is high increased irritability and aggression can be added to the mix, we have already mentioned insomnia, and should not forget the potential damage you are causing to smaller blood vessels of the brain. Increases are also guaranteed in terms of your breathing, blood pressure and heart rate.

Once you are completely down from your Ya ba experience many find their mood is low, they snap at others unnecessarily and feel very depressed.

Really negative effects!

Due to the highly addictive qualities of this drug many users go on Ya ba binges that can last anything from a full weekend to an incredible 10 days. Needless to say this length of continual drug taking does you no good whatsoever.

The reason for these extended sessions is because a user is continually chasing that originally high. If such thoughts are in your mind, please forget them, that initial high will not be recaptured.

Yes, you may get close to it, and yes, this will encourage yet more Ya ba to be taken, but the truth is you will simply achieve a constant state of disorientation where the clock means very little.

Binge use will bring on many unwanted problems. Body, and particularly hand tremors will be yours, high blood pressure, hallucinations, paranoia, anxiety, nervousness and the inability to stay still accompany memory loss and confusion.

Those at the thick-end of a long Ya ba session often lose control completely with many turning violent without any provocation.

Where to turn if Ya ba is getting the better of you:

Coming off this drug alone is a very difficult thing to achieve. The cravings you will have are stronger than the majority of user’s willpower. It is a fact that constant thoughts and feelings of need for ‘just one more tab’ will linger longer than your decision to self-quit.

Professional rehab services are required to assist with treatment and recovery. While voluntary organisations are there to assist and perform an admirable job, it is felt by many that a stay as an inpatient in a quality rehab establishment is the most effective platform to help you come off, and stay off this highly potent substance.

There is NO shame in seeking help:

Anyone who is overindulging in Ya ba should never be ashamed to admit the fact this drug has currently got the better of them.

If it is strong enough to aid horses dragging heavy loads up mountains, it is certainly strong enough to grab and hold your attention for far longer than you wish.

Don’t let this drug destroy your life due to the fact you are too proud or scared to seek help. Professional rehab staff are there for a very good reason. They have chosen this career to assist and treat men and women addicted to substances such as Ya ba. Please let them help you. It will be a life changing decision you will not regret.

It is quite frightening how quickly drug dependence can catch up with those who use illegal substances for recreational purposes.

Enjoyable experiences call for more of the same:

It is a natural reaction for anyone to want more of something that gives them enjoyment. In the case of illegal drugs this enjoyment is felt through the highs offered and an enhanced feeling of enjoyment which adds to the sense of occasion.

The problem with such experiences is that your body and mind quickly take to the substance(s) of choice and hanker for more.

With regular use you are building up a tolerance that demands attention. This attention comes in the form of repeated use, but the same amount taken on a regular basis eventually lessens the impact making those initial highs insufficient to fully satisfy.

The obvious answer? Load more into the pipe, draw up an extra line, or pop a couple of tabs rather than just the one.

This solution will certainly do the trick, those highs and good feelings you are chasing will come running, but at a price. That price is an ever increasing dependence upon drugs.

Signs your drug dependence is deepening:

It cannot be stressed enough just how quickly you can find yourself in a situation where drugs are not fun anymore, they are a necessity.

The once weekly ritual has turned into a couple of times each week which soon gets into a daily groove that draws your mind and body to your substance(s) of choice. Before long you find going without that much needed hit produces some very unwanted withdrawal symptoms.

These unwanted symptoms can easily be quashed: Make sure you keep topped up! Of course, the longer you continue down this route the more dependent you become.

While signs manifest themselves from a behavioural, physical and psychological point of view we will give just 4 examples of many that are most easily recognisable.

If you acknowledge any of these then it really is time to seek professional rehab assistance.

Behaviour:

A drug user’s behaviour is a major pointer to increased use. While there are many behavioural traits that give you away. Let’s just concentrate on 4:

Increased obsession:

Those who find their dependence is growing will have increasingly obsessive thoughts about their next hit. These thoughts will take priority over everything else.

Family and social obligations will often be forgotten or disregarded because they could interfere with the all-consuming need for drugs.

Aware of the damage you are causing:

This behaviour will start alarm bells ringing to those closest to you. You will also be very much aware of the damage you are causing to them and yourself.

The problem here is that the need for, and urge to continue drug use has become too strong to abstain.

Attempting to hide use:

The greater a user’s need the more desperate they become in trying to hide their increased usage from others.

While a user strongly believes they are successfully hiding use from others this is quite the opposite. Regular disappearances from company, changes in attitude and demeanour, and rapid mood changes all point to the fact that drugs have taken control of your actions and reactions.

What needs to be realised is that those closest to you know you very well. Once your behavioural pattern changes they will be the first to notice. It must also be repeated that the only person you are really fooling in terms of how much you need that increasingly regular hit is YOU!

Denial:

This is a critical pointer. Those relying more and more on drugs will proclaim loudly to anyone who cares to listen that their drug use is nowhere near as serious as others may think.

The reality is that the user knows it is far more serious than others think, but believes continued denial will help the problem go away.

It will not! What will happen is that you will become ever more dependent and eventually have to face the consequences of such action.

Do yourself and those closest to you a BIG favour:

Dependence on drugs will not go away on its own. Continuing on the increased use route will deepen dependence and rapidly turn into full blown addiction.

There is a way out, and while it will be no walk in the park it is far better than the continued slide into addiction.

Quit denying there is a problem with your drugs use and contact a counsellor at a well-established rehabilitation establishment.

These caring professionals are there to help and have seen it all before. You should feel no shame in making such contact. Indeed, you should be proud to have made such a call.

Once this contact is established a plan will be put into place that will help you to understand the reasons behind your drug use, what can be done to stop it, and a structured treatment route to a drug free future will be discussed, agreed and implemented.

Mention the topic of sex addiction and it will generally produce sniggers, lewd comments and a strong desire by wags to spend ‘’just a short, regular time’’ in the company of a sex addict.

The reality for those suffering from this compulsive condition is very, very different.

Just what is sex addiction?

Quite the opposite to what many think. It is a condition that has men and women suffering from a compulsive need to perform continuous sexual acts.

This desire and need is very similar to the ‘hit’ an alcoholic gets from constant drinking or the high a drug addict chases.

It is a disorder that affects your physical and mental health, in the main it will eventually doom one-on-one personal relationships, and due to the risky situations those addicted to sex are putting themselves into it can be highly dangerous.

Similar to those addicted to substances a sex addict cannot control their behaviour. This is despite the fact they understand the negative consequences attached to it.

When put into such a perspective it should be clear that this condition really is no fun whatsoever.

Another disturbing fact is that many addiction professionals believe this is a far more common problem than is ever acknowledged.

Uncontrollable need = Potentially serious consequences:

Adults suffering from this condition will seek out multiple sex partners. While this may not be seen as such a serious issue, for many addicted to sex it also means that anything will do. This includes relationships with children or animals.

They are prepared to use a wide variety of objects for satisfaction, often use pornographic material excessively and feel the need to masturbate constantly.

This insatiable behaviour will shape the everyday routine of a sex addict to ensure they are getting as much sex as possible.

Experts at hiding this addiction:

Those with this condition come from the complete range of backgrounds, they can be single, have live-in lovers or be married with a family, but one thing they all have in common is their ability to hide this addiction from others.

This is often achieved through lying or ensuring their sex schedule is fulfilled in places and at times that will not raise suspicion.

Enjoying a healthy sex life does NOT indicate an addiction to sex:

Please do not think that enjoying a healthy, active and varied sex life means you are addicted to sex.

Quite the opposite, those who enjoy a whole variety of sexual acts with willing and consensual partners are simply adding to their enjoyment of life.

The line sex addicts cross is that they have a constant and compulsive need to engage in sexual acts. Their sexual appetite cannot be fully satisfied.

Indeed, they appear to have no control over immensely strong sexual impulses. These draw them on a very regular basis to whoever or whatever will meet their needs before moving on to the next conquest.

This sexual merry-go-round continues on a non-stop basis and the only hope a person has of slowing it down and eventually stepping off is to seek professional, qualified rehab assistance.

Rehab and treatment methods:

Like other dependencies, sex addiction offers no restrictions on entry, it is a disease and changes a person in many ways. But, there is one very important difference to other addictions; it is much harder to treat.

This is because unlike drink or drug addiction the sex addict cannot be expected to give up sex for the rest of their life. As we have clearly stated above, sex is a normal, healthy part of a person’s life.

Treatment for sex addiction must centre around educating the addict about what is and what is not healthy sexual behaviour. Treatment and healing is a slow, steady process that needs effort, support and understanding from all concerned.

While such treatment and counselling may take months or even years, it should be made very clear that recovery is certainly achievable, and it is a must for anyone currently struggling with this addiction.

An excellent place to begin treatment:

There are several organisations and outpatient treatment facilities available to help, but it is agreed by many that an extended stay at a quality rehab establishment is the most positive way to get the healing process fully underway.

In many cases a sex addict needs to be taken away from their daily routine and regular environment for a minimum of one month, and in all truth, the longer the better.

Quality rehab establishments provide the perfect background for healing. Experienced counsellors will work with clients to initially help them understand the damaging effects their impulses are having on themselves and those around them.

These seeds will be sown through in-depth one-to-one counselling sessions as well as honest and open group therapy discussions

From this solid base healing can continue. An extended stay at a quality rehab establishment is the perfect springboard in helping overcome this addiction.

It is also vital to remember that aftercare is an absolute, continuous, must, and that revisits to the rehab establishment should be considered on a regular basis to reinforce and continue the healing process.